Things discussed recently over dinner at my parents house:
1) My mom didn't know that anything beyond soft core porn was legal. My sister went into an 8 minute story about the porn/AIDS scare that happened in California last year.
2) My sister recalled the time her ex-boyfriend dropped acid and was tripping for a whole day. Apparently they fell in love with a candle and a sandwich maker.
3) My dad innocently said he would "toss his own salad". After my sister and I busted out laughing, we refused to explain the slang meaning. Five minutes later, my mom insists that she knows what it is because it can also be called "a slang term that begins with R" We also decided it is impossible to "toss one's own salad". If you know how it is possible, please keep it to yourself.
4) My mom used some outdated metaphor about cleaning up a dirty wet horse before you put her away that sounded like something women do after sex. (My parents' metaphors are very outdated)
I might have 2 sisters and my parents have a happy marriage and a white fence, but we aren't really a normal family.
...Also, in my sleepy daze this morning I accidentally shaved my sideburns back to normal length. May they rest in peace.
2 comments:
My family is weird too. There are so many inside jokes and weird phrases (Twang! You're a sandwich!) in my family that dinner time at my house is always interesting.
But at the end of the meal, everyone always has a full belly and a smile on their face, so I guess it works well enough for us.
A sandwich maker is one of those "Foreman Grill-esque" appliances that you put a sandwich into and close. It heats the sandwich and grills the bread a little. They also make a quesadilla maker, which I own and is sitting in our storage closet.
Apparently when one is tripping, sandwich makers sing Donna Summer's "Hot Stuff" and the "Hot Pockets" jingle.
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